We all have that one special person in our lives. The grammar nerd. The one who comments on Facebook, ignoring what you said to tell you how you said it wrong. They say “well” instead of “good” when you ask how their day is. Worse yet, they interrupt you when you’re telling a story to fix what you are saying.
Don’t you ever just get tired of the grammar nerds’ endless quest to fix bad grammar?
There’s a way to stop them. Well, there are two ways. One, you could stop posting and stop talking, but that’s no fun at all. The second is much more fun.
You can torment your grammar nerd.
Well, that’s where I come in. See, for years, I didn’t get grammar. Who cared if the Present Perfect is used in the main clause and the Simple Past is used in the dependent clause? I didn’t see the difference between “I have eaten, I eat, I ate,” or “I had eaten.” But then a change occurred.
I took a job teaching grammar to college students learning English as a Second Language. Suddenly I had thirty students waiting for me to explain the mysteries of English grammar, and most of them were determined to learn because they knew their success depended on how well they could write and speak English. I had to know the answers.
As I studied, so I wouldn’t look like a fool in front of them, something particular happened.
I grew to love English grammar.
And I really liked having all the answers. (Well, most of them. I looked some up.)
I get where you’re coming from. Corrections can be annoying. So I thought we’d have some fun with those grammar nerds and torment them properly.
Care to come along for this?